Wednesday, 13 February 2013

Day Forty-Four: 2,307 Words

Day Two of writing: 1,086 words across four pages.

I’ve moved whole-heartedly into Chapter One, and deposited Dow at the airport. There’s a little bit of procedure that we see him go through at the house and prepare to leave and it puts a little more of Dow’s mindset into play, as well as showing off one of those good-sense concessions that people tend to make to one another in a relationship:

Dow showered and shaved and pulled himself into most of an old black suit that seemed to have grown a couple of sizes since he had last worn it. He skipped the tie; pocketing it as he went to the little wall safe in the closet and pulled his sidearm. The safe wasn’t strictly necessary—there had never been children, and the gun was just as firmly bio-locked as the work phone—but Marisol had always insisted.

That goes on for a while and gets followed up with a stretch of the car ride between the house and the airfield, which is pretty firmly dedicated to a slow boil of an argument between Marisol and Dow that leads to her snubbing him some when he finally gets out of the car. There’s a good level of contention on display, I think, and—since their relationship’s collapse is firmly on both of them—I’ve tried to make sure that they both end up playing the bad guy some before Dow leaves the vehicle; each of them taking on hostility or disinterest, prying into one another’s work either to goad the other into aggression or just to change the subject.

I think it works a lot better at illustrating the state of their relationship than the bit I complained about in the Prologue does. It felt like something that needed a little more time dedicated to it, so I don’t have an issue giving it a couple of pages here so long as it pays off later.

Now to dig more thoroughly into the case and some cool future-tech!



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